Still Taboo

I try to stay positive and light hearted for you guys, I really do but sometimes reality sucks. Only day three back at school after half term and this is just part of the aftermath of his school refusal. Somehow, alone I managed to get him into the taxi (still in his pyjamas as he’s past the age of me being able to physically force clothing onto him, with his clothes and shoes in a bag) only for his taxi to return less than five minutes later as he’s attacking his escort and it’s ‘unsafe’ for them to continue! Nobody in ‘authority’ seems to care about whether it’s safe for me or Whirlwind while they all continue to pass the buck about who can or will provide services and support. I’m sorry if I offend anyone but on days like this I really can’t ‘see the positives of autism’, today I hate autism and what it’s doing to me and Whirlwind.

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I’ve written in more depth previously about the abuse some autism/PDA parents suffer at the hands of their child, The New Taboo , and about the tragedies that can, and do occur when those who should be helping don’t, There But For The Grace Of God and Another Statistic to the New Taboo but authorities still refuse to accept that this is happening, all over the world to hundreds, if not thousands, of parents right at this very minute.

UPDATE 20/2/15
Knowing that Whirlwind’s violent outbursts are predominantly triggered by “fight or flight” and that his preferred response is “flight” I was determined that I would not be pressured (either by school, taxi or bystanders) to force the issue today. The result was that the second I opened the door to take him to the taxi he bolted! Trying to follow him or ‘drag’ him back only leads to “fight” taking over so I tried persuasion and lowering demands, whilst we didn’t get a violent meltdown neither did I manage to get him into the taxi! So, another day of school refusal from him and another day of house arrest for me!

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6 thoughts on “Still Taboo

  1. I’m so unbelievably sorry that this is happening to you. I won’t even insult you by asking you if you’ve tried this, that, or the next thing because I know you will have. I can only give you cyber hugs, and seriously, if anyone is offended by you reaching out in your distress than they probably should move along!

  2. OMG! I am sooo deeply sorry for you.My Autistic son is 11 & an absolute lovely.I hear & see other parent’s struggles & I know that I am so lucky.My thoughts are with even though I know my well wishes will change nothing in your life.You will survive & exist.That is what we do.Keep breathing in & out & get through the next hour….and repeat.Kind Regards x

    1. Thank you Lisa, it helps that I’m able to share with you all, both the good and the bad. I find putting it ‘out there’ to be very cathartic and if it resonates with others, helps them to realise they aren’t alone or helps decision makers to stop and think about how their decisions affect us then so much the better.

  3. I don’t think anyone could be offended by this – they are not reading, or looking, or listening if so. You need help, and I wish I had the answers. I also wish your story was an unusual one, but sadly you know as well as I do that it’s not and it’s about time those in charge the money bags really took a long hard look at themselves and their consciences and figure out if they are spending that money in the best possible way. You having to go through this is not right. People turning a blind eye is not right 😦

  4. I’m sending huge hugs and lots of love nothing anyone can say helps but you are doing an amazing job It’s hard for parents but it’s even harder for the child I can’t imagine what they go through every day. Iv also had a chunk bitten from my arm but I just embraced with a huge hug even though I was hurting for my grandson ( and my arm) hope tomorrow is better than today xxx

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